so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
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Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
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