Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I checked into jail on foursquare
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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