Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Enjoy the penises
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
