I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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