I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
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we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
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It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.