I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I fill condoms, not promises.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.