I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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