Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
