I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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