Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
