It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
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All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
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Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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