We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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