All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Randomize