i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
