Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
