well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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