Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
He better not be in your backpack
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
You can't just leave with hair like that
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
