There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!