I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
