People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Randomize
