She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
