My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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