I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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