i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
