Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Randomize