Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
