Texts From Last Night

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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.

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  (630): I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real. http://tfl.nu/twnp
  Replies (16) Good night (3502) Bad night (1562)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation

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  (740): i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation http://tfl.nu/vlgs
  Replies (12) Good night (1279) Bad night (2727)
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  (646): View more from New York

  all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.

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  (646): all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries. http://tfl.nu/485r
  Replies (2) Good night (3558) Bad night (911)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.

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  (240): I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged. http://tfl.nu/1zhu
  Replies (9) Good night (3502) Bad night (1401)
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.

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  (828): Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me. http://tfl.nu/wdvy
  Replies (15) Good night (8295) Bad night (1236)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...

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  (908): At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ... http://tfl.nu/ikiv
  Replies (10) Good night (1282) Bad night (1531)
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"

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  (218): you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen" http://tfl.nu/038r
  Replies (8) Good night (2842) Bad night (963)
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  (212): View more from New York

  Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.

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  (212): Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no. http://tfl.nu/7lbb
  Replies (10) Good night (2681) Bad night (981)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex

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  (732): he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex http://tfl.nu/opy4
  Replies (4) Good night (1637) Bad night (1075)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.

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  (309): You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks. http://tfl.nu/3xq6
  Replies (7) Good night (3008) Bad night (576)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.

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  (815): All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time. http://tfl.nu/0jym
  Replies (3) Good night (608) Bad night (984)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..

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  (540): margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted.. http://tfl.nu/mj6g
  Replies (3) Good night (1050) Bad night (817)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.

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  (612): And the cockring thing wasn't sexual. http://tfl.nu/ceb9
  Replies (19) Good night (425) Bad night (783)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass

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  (775): You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass http://tfl.nu/qd0r
  Replies (5) Good night (704) Bad night (480)
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  (347): View more from New York

  Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.

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  (347): Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it. http://tfl.nu/i5dj
  Replies (0) Good night (484) Bad night (199)

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