Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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