Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize