they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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