Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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