What did we do last night that was yellow?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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