I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
