this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
