it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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