guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
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