The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize
