I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize