Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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