I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
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