Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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