Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
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