am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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