ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize