Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
