On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
