She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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