Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Randomize
