No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize