If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize