She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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