Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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