i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
